Mondays

by Jim Fry

It's funny how some days start off bad and go straight into the waste bin as the day progresses. I almost had a day like that recently.

It started out with a freak storm that was supposed to be rain but was actually snow. The preceeding days, all the weather reports said rain. Now, most people really don't care if it rains or snows, but most people don't have 200 ft. driveways that angle up to the street and require an Atlas booster rocket to propel their autos up the steep slippery incline. During the winter months, if it might snow, I always park the car at the top of the driveway.

Guess who got caught with his proverbial pants down? That's just what I need on a Monday morning. I hate Mondays! You've got all the work that you didn't get done last week to finish besides all the stuff scheduled for the new week and the weekends never seem to be long enough.

With a few curses about those idiot weathermen I gag down a bowl of cereal, run out the door, and start to shovel 2" of snow off 200 ft of driveway hoping that I can clear it just enough to get the car up to the street where I find that my newspaper wasn't delivered in time again! God, I hate Mondays!

Then, it's a not so pleasant drive 30 miles to work. What are all those people doing on MY parkway and why can't those snow plows work at 50 mph? I hate Mondays!

After an eternity of playing dodgeball with all the other commuting fools I finally get to work to discover that the lock on the parking lot gate is frozen. After thawing out the lock with my breath I finally get inside the building to find that the roof is still leaking and the furnace shut down sometime over the weekend. I hate Mondays! Once the boiler’s been reset and the puddles of water have been cleaned up it's time to shovel the sidewalk in front of the building before the hordes of people pack it into ice. Ah, the joys of being your own boss with no employees! God, I hate Mondays!

I've finally gotten that finished and I'm sweating like some barnyard animal and I still haven't had my first cup of coffee. Damn! I hate Mondays! Oh well, I better have a cup of coffee and relax for 10 minutes before starting work. Maybe I should do something pleasant like check my cuttings. What's this? Roots growing out of the bottom of the pot! New growth starting to pop on another plant! There's 'Brown Eyes', 'Apricot Fantasy x J.Blair', 'Great Eastern', 'Graf Zeppelin' and 'Madam de Bruin'! Roots! Roots! Roots! Multiples of Blutopia, Atraflo, Pink Magic fighting to push their roots out those bottom holes. It looks like it's going to be a bumper crop of plants. Maybe I was too hasty about this day......

Boy, it's great to be alive on a beautiful snowy Monday! No matter what happens now, this is a good day. The roof can cave in or a customer can call to cancel an order today. I know I'll have to make the commute home this afternoon and I'll have that driveway to shovel off again but I don't care! I've got roots! God, I love this hobby!

Note: My wife thinks I’ve gone totally ‘round the bend with this one and is already making reservations for one of us in a nice, quiet, rubber room. -JDF